Friday, April 30, 2010

For the next few days...

Hi guys :) So for the next few days, probably until Tuesday, I will be eating like a normal person. I know, it seems hard to believe that this is possible. I just can't focus on my exams when I'm constantly thinking about food, or berating myself for a binge, or whatever. So in order to not fail out of college, I will eat. Just until Tuesday, and then it's back to starving. I am not counting calories, because I will want to kill myself. I will not weigh myself until Wednesday, and then I will lose all the weight I've gained back. As long as I don't let it turn into a four-day binge, I shouldn't gain too much.

I got weighed at the doctor's office yesterday and I was 179, but I really needed to pee, was fully clothed, and had just eaten lunch. So it wasn't a completely accurate number. After doing my exam (annual gyno exam, yay fun) the doctor asked me, was my diet and exercise was going alright? Do I exercise? Yes, of course I exer
cise. I love it when doctors imply that you are fat without actually saying it. It was not her job to ask my those questions, but she did anyway. Like she felt justified because she had just looked in my vagina. Right.

I want to kill myself slightly less than on Wednesday, which is good. I think that eating normally for a few days will be good for me, because then I won't get really stressed and binge and hate myself.

Well, sorry I can't be more inspiring. I'll inspire you all starting again on Tuesday, when I will start to shed all the weight I gain over the next few days. Think thin!


  1. You are brave! I hope you lose weight, not gain. I don't know how it works when you eat like a normal person.

    Really, that fucking scares me. I find myself very wired during finals in college when I starve:) I kinda like it.

    GOOD LUCK and keep us posted!

  2. Eating like a normal person will be good for you :) <3 Good luck for all your exams! =]


  3. Yeah, i do the same thing!:D You're gonna be fine. Just try to eat, salads and you know stuff that won't make a big impact on your weight :D. Good luck!!

  4. yea, i act the same way too during exams... or else i can't even read a single word! we can't sacrifice our grades, so just eat for now, and u can go back to ur old schedule soon :) /xo

  5. Oh man, I hate gyno exams! It's been so long since I've been, and I just keep putting it off. Oh well.

    Good luck on your exams! Probably best to eat so you can concentrate. xoxo

  6. I've never been to the vagina doctor before. O.O
    All those shiny metal tools intimidate me... :/

    Good luck on your exams :)
    Eat a burger on my behalf!

    <3 Lots and lots of love

  7. Just recently found your blog and I wanted to say that I really love it. Good luck on your exams! :)