I can't believe I've made it to 100 posts! I also have 90 followers, which is completely amazing as well. Thank you all so much for sticking with me since the beginning, or for joining me on my journey. It's crazy what has happened since my first post. I started blogging after I'd already lost 20 pounds in a month. I started blogging because I was struggling and I wanted support, and that's exactly what I found here. You guys are my best friends, and I love you all so much! I really and truly appreciate you with all my heart.
And look at me now! I am so glad I chose recovery. I didn't realize how unhappy I was until I was happier. I was talking to Thelma today (bf's mom who I like) and she said that at the beginning of the summer she didn't really like me that much. She said she couldn't figure out why I seemed so unhappy, and she had assumed that she was doing something wrong. She obviously didn't know that I was so unhappy because I was torturing myself! Now that she knows, she says it makes so much more sense.
I'm glad that I am happier now, truly. Even though recovery sucks sometimes and is super scary, it's the best thing for me. I can actually enjoy life instead of run away from it. I can't imagine living with my ED right now. This upcoming semester I'm taking 5 classes, being a TA for another class, working at three jobs, and holding two positions within my sorority. I literally don't have any time to be lost in my ED. I also can't imagine focusing on school while starving again. It got really bad last semester and I had to eat normally during finals because I just couldn't concentrate when I was so hungry and obsessed. Seriously, I am the happiest girl in the world to be a little more free than before of this evil thing called an eating disorder.
Thank you all again for sticking with me! As celebration for my 100th post, I'm posting another picture of me. This time, a healthy picture! I'm NOT starving in this picture :)
**Picture deleted for privacy reasons**
This is my boyfriend and I making silly faces! Isn't he the cutest thing you have ever seen?! He is the best thing that has ever happened to me (besides recovery of course), and he is completely supportive of me, no matter what. I want to marry him someday (shh, don't tell him, lol).
Ya'll are amazing and awesome and fantastic and I love each and every one of you. Even if I don't read your blog anymore because it would be triggering, even if I don't know you, even if you don't comment. I still love you. Stay strong lovelies <3