Monday, July 4, 2011

Updates! On really old stuff too.

I haven't cut myself, which is good. My period is coming to an end, and I think the hormones are letting up. I was not a raging bitch at work on Thursday (on Wednesday, I was a crazy person) and Friday was a good day. Yesterday (Sunday) I was a bit bitchy, but that was for good reasons. First, my dad got freaked out at me for eating some whipped cream (his words were, "Stop eating that! Save some for the rest of us!"), when he didn't even want me to buy it in the first place! I was already a little emotional before that happened, because the church message was about forgiving those who have hurt you, and of course my mind went straight to Morgan and Isaac (the two people who have sexually assaulted/abused me). Crying in church sucks.

But anyway, after I recovered from my anger at my dad, I went shopping. Yay for 4th of July sales! I was trying to get to a specific shopping center, but I didn't know where it was and I forgot to ask the parents before I left. So after calling them 10 times and being convinced that they'd been murdered while I was gone, I spent 30 minutes driving aimlessly around the same area before finally finding it. But the good news is that I got a beautiful shirt for only $10! Of course, my parents were not dead when I got home, but I was still pretty angry with them. I hid out in my room for a while, and felt better.

On a completely different note, I realized that I never ended the best friend saga! If you look at these posts: one, two, three, four, and five, you'll see the crazy saga of my best friend Jamie and our epic fights. Some of the posts also include conflicts with my other friend Dana, but mostly this is about Jamie. Sooo, now that you're all caught up, here's what happened: Jamie and I got in another HUGE fight at the beginning of May. It was Jamie's birthday, and we took her out to dinner. Or rather, she forced us to go to an expensive place with her. I didn't get her a card or anything, because she had said that she didn't want anything. Plus I forgot. She seemed cool with that.

Then I found out that my paternal grandmother died, and I told Jamie and Dana the next day at dinner. When I told them that, Jamie's only response was, "On my birthday??? That makes it 10x worse!" My response to that was to tell her that she was so incredibly selfish for making this all about her, when really she should be asking how I was doing. She got pissed about that and left. I went to my room and blocked her on Facebook (immature, I know) because I was done. I was just done with our friendship. I was fed up with being abused, mistreated, trampled on, and blamed for everything. Then Jamie came over and yelled at me for not getting her a bday card! Like, seriously? What the hell. When she finished yelling, I told her that I was done. I told her that I couldn't be in this friendship anymore because it made me feel like crap all the time. She said that if she left my room, then we could never speak again. I almost decided to take her back, but thankfully, my better sense kicked in and I kicked her out.

Jamie and I spoke briefly over Facebook message after that, mostly to make sure that neither of us would talk about the other to other friends. Dana and I remained friends, and now we are basically best friends. For real though, not for fake, like with Jamie. We're still working on getting close, like I am with my other friends, but we are WAY closer than Jamie and I ever were.

The reason I thought of this is because I sent Jamie a Facebook message yesterday to wish her a happy summer and 4th of July. I figured that I could still be nice to her, because hating people just sucks. We've been talking a lot during the past 24 hours, and it's nice to be on good terms with her. Yay!

So that's it! I still can't breathe very well from the incident that happened at work (see my last post). If I can't breathe tomorrow, I am reporting it to my supervisor and going to the doctor. I haven't been able to sing in my car! Torture! I also can't do cardio, which is less of a torture, lol.
Oh, also, I've lost weight. Not on purpose, it just happened. I think I've gained muscle and lost fat from all the working out :) Just thought I'd notify you all. It's not much, but people can tell. I've gotten comments.

Sorry this is such a long post! Anyhoo, I gotta go to a lunch with my gramma and parents now! Should be fun :) Love you all!!!! <3

1 comment:

  1. Wow, Jamie was a fucking cretin! Good riddance!

    I will go see the doctor, I promise. I need to get a refill in 2 weeks, so if it hasn't gotten any better by then I'll be raising hell, I assure you!

    Lol, passing out in the middle of the road would probably be more convenient than passing out in the shower or something. At least then people could see me and take me to hospital! XD

    Love you! *Huggles* take care of yourself, ok?