this post for more details.
So my therapist's theory is that since I have a very high anxiety level, and I had an extremely high anxiety level when I was younger, I can't focus on much else. When my brain is so preoccupied with being anxious and dealing with that, it has a hard time processing and storing the other information coming in, like life events and such. It's an interesting theory, I think. My theory was that I am permanently stuck in fight-or-flight mode, because of all the trauma I have been through. In fight-or-flight, you either remember everything super clearly, or you block out everything. Clearly, I would have the blocking out type. I don't know who is right here, but they are both viable theories :)
So on with my week. Tuesday at work was good, but a bit crazy, since it was the "Monday" of the week (no work Monday cuz of the 4th of July). Wednesday, I only worked two hours, and then took the rest of the day off to go to an info session on the graduate program I want to attend. It was a great session and I definitely want to do this program (it's a Masters in Social Work program). Now I just have to get in... they only accept 150 students out of the 700 applications they receive each year! Yuck.
I also got in trouble at work on Wednesday. I neglected to remind my supervisors that I would be leaving early, so they neglected to find me a sub. When I got to work on Wednesday, I assumed that they would have found someone, so I left after two hours, like I'd planned. And apparently, I should have a) reminded them more often, and b) found a sub (even though they said they would take care of it). Ugg. They didn't mention it today, so whatever. I'm sure it's fine. It does raise the amount of pressure I'm under though. Now I feel like I have to be even more perfect.
Today was a good, easy day. I didn't do much at work, and tonight, all I did was watch TV and paint my nails :) Yay for relaxation! I also went to the doctor today to talk about my breathing issues. He said that I have temporary asthma caused by an allergic reaction to whatever was in the box. My lung function is down 30%, which is fairly significant. He gave me some pills that should take care of it in a few weeks, so yay! I'm glad that I'm not broken forever. I'm tired of coughing and not being able to breathe.
Tomorrow is Friday, and I'm super glad. I need a weekend. I hope you guys have a great Friday and weekend too! <3