Thursday, June 2, 2011
I'm contemplating going to the gym, but I am so tired. I didn't get a ton of sleep last night because I was cleaning (I know, I'm weird), and I got up pretty earlier to go to this knitting circle thing. I had an eye doctor appointment and am trying a different brand of contacts for a week. And then I cleaned! So in short, I feel like I should work out, but I'm really sore from yesterday (I did some really hard cardio and had physical therapy) and I'm exhausted from cleaning. I don't know what I'm going to do.
Here's the thing: I think a normal person would say, "Ok, I cleaned a bunch today and I'm tired. I'll just skip the gym. That's fine." But since I'm not a normal person, I say, "Well, I did clean today, but that didn't burn as many calories as cardio and didn't get my heart rate up. And who cares of I'm sore? I should just push through it. Plus I'll feel guilty if I don't work out!" That's the kicker right there: guilt. Guilt gets me every time. I don't know if I should or shouldn't work out, but I probably will end up working out anyway because I'll feel guilty if I don't. Not healthy, I know.
See, this is the kind of thing that worries me. I really, really don't want this gym membership thing to get obsessive. But I can't change who I am. I will probably always feel guilty for not working out if I'd planned to, and for not going the full time that I'd planned for cardio (i.e. I did 32 minutes of biking instead of 35. Big deal, right? For me it is.). All I'm saying is, I have to watch it.
Ok, I'll go away now. I have a headache and I'm super tired. So long!